Monday, August 24, 2009

Another song that is my life.


(A Better Son/Daughter, by Rilo Kiley)





Sometimes in the morning I am petrified and can't move
Awake but cannot open my eyes
And the weight is crushing down on my lungs
I know I can't breathe
And hope someone will save me this time
And your mother's still calling you insane and high
Swearing it's different this time
And you tell her to give in to the demons that possess her
That god never blessed her insides
Then you hang up the phone and feel badly for upsetting things
Crawl back into bed to dream of a time When your heart was open wide and you love things just because
Like the sick and dying

And sometimes when you're on
You're really fuckin' on
And your friends they sing along
And they love you
But the lows are so extreme
That the good seems fuckin' cheap
And it teases you for weeks in its absence
But you'll fight and you'll make it through You'll fake it if you have to
And you'll show up for work with a smile
You'll be better
And You'll be smarter
And More grown up
and a better daughter
or son
And a real good friend
And you'll be awake
You'll be alert
You'll be positive
though it hurts

And you'll laugh and embrace all your friends
And you'll be a real good listener
You'll be honest

You'll be brave.
You'll be handsome
and you'll
be
beautiful

You'll be happy

Your ship may be coming in
You're weak but not giving in
To the cries and the wails of the valley below
And your ship may be coming in
You're weak but not giving in
And you'll fight it you'll go out fighting all of em

Ben Gibbard, you know my life.

I haven't felt this way in a while, but I used too; Very prominently. I was just laying in my bed listening to iTunes on shuffle, and this song came on (Someday You Will Be Loved, by Death Cab):


I cannot pretend that I felt any regret
'Cause each broken heart will eventually mend
As the blood runs red down the needle and thread
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

You may feel alone when you're falling asleep
And every time tears roll down your cheeks
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet
Someday you will be loved



(^^^I'm going to tell myself over and over, as many times as i need to.)

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

suck it.

I thought I was over it. I NEED to be over it. THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO. I want to move to Florida in the fall, which is a spectacular possibility. "drink all daaaaaaaay, play all niiiiiiiiiiiiight (i'm in miami, bitchhhh)".

I don't even understand why I feel like this...

I just want my tattoo, and many more afterward... My body will become a canvas for artists everywhere, my bare skin is becoming annoying and just... unnecessary, for lack of a better word ;

DESTROY ME




My iPod is still gone, I want a new one.
Enveloping myself in music is the only thing I can think of that may trick me into believing that everything is going to be ok.

everything is going to be ok.


keep the w i n d at your back and the sun on your f a c e.

keepthewindatyourbackandthesunonyourface.
keep the wind at your BACK and the sun on your face.
KEEP THE WIND AT YOUR BACK AND THE SUN ON YOUR FACE.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

just some fave fails, etc.













































































































HONESTLY

Why is it that I only attract less than attractive males? I honestly thought I was OK looking at least, but for some reason, nasty losers and guys I have no interest in are forever hitting on me. Is that conceited? YEAH IT IS. BUT. Whatever, dude I honestly don't understand why I can't be pulling hotter dick. Oh, also, if a hot guy is interested, he has had or continues to have sexual relations with fugly bitches. OHHH MAAA GAHHHHH. HELP, I NEED SOME INSIGHT.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

..............
reminiscing about exactly three years ago today.


just one of those days that will stay with you forever.


finally able to look back and appreciate my happier times, rather than dwell on them.

gimme.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

depressed.

my camera is still gone. i've been having continuous panic attacks since. i don't know what to do, my camera was how i thrived daily. i need 800 dollars. good fucking luck, right?

Sunday, May 10, 2009

hmm......

some people just make me feel icky... I don't know how else to describe it... I don't particularly hate these certain people, I just get an uneasy feeling when I see pictures of them or they are talked about. It is the oddest feeling.

Monday, April 27, 2009

FLASHBACK!

All of my clothes suck and all I do is work, dressed like an 1890's hooker.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

HOLY. SHIT. Easily the scariest creature on earth.

VAMPIRE SQUID FROM HELL=the actual translation of it's latin name

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

yes, i post two entries a day.


best cake ever^


soooooo it's been nearly a month since I turned 20... where did/does the time go?!

meeeerrp


today should be a fun day :)

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

for your enjoyment and mine:

wtf #1 (there will be many "wtf" entries, I guarantee it)

See the thing is, all of these ugly bitches with mediocre personalities are bagging very attractive, eligible guys. The planets must have aligned recently or something, because there are chicks out there that are to say the least, quite the contenders. ANYWAY, if someone could please explain to me why these idiots are with beautiful boys, that would be spectacular.

BEST CRAFT DAY EVER:

!

Who "fuq yeeuh"'d my last post about Ariel Pink? I want to shake your hand.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Haunted Graffiti.

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Ariel Pink^

steps to a shitty day:

Want to feel worthless?

1. Wake up at 1pm and lay in bed watching t.v. for 2 hours after that.
2. Next, take a shower.
3. Then, sit naked in your room reading a book for another hour.
4. Go downstairs and eat a chocolate chip cookie,
5. Return to bed for more t.v.
6. Go pee.
7. Put on a lil makeup.
8. Watch more t.v. in bed.
(**NOTE: must be logged into Facebook, Twitter and Myspace all day)
9. Make egg salad.
10. Write a blog entry about your idiotic day.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Friday, March 13, 2009

p.s. gimme dis

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?

I feel like I'm missing out on something; I'm missing something.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

sufjannnnnnnnnn

HOW CAN SOMEONE BE SO HOT AND SMART AND QUIRKY AND TALENTED? WHERE ARE THE REST OF YOU?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!


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laaaateedaaaaaaaaa

I've rediscovered my love of listening to music NON STOP. For some reason, I hadn't been listening to music as frequently as usual, but now... My ipod would shoot me in the face if it could, due to overwork. I literally cannot describe my love for all of the music that makes me feel so good... I want to fill a giant bathtub with songs and jump in and never get out.


Current obsession:

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Thursday, March 5, 2009

I feel...

I hope it stays dark forever

I hope the worst isn't over

And I hope you blink before I do

Yeah I hope I never get sober

And I hope when you think of me years down the line

You can't find one good thing to say

And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out

You'd stay the hell out of my way

I am drowning

There is no sign of land

You are coming down with me

Hand in unlovable hand

And I hope you die

I hope we both die

8===D

I can't stop thinking about guys. I feel like I'm in high school again... shit's takin over!

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

cobwebs

Hewwooooo, if any people out thurrrr have any suggestions for a book? I'm looking for something mindless, a quick read. I just finished reading an intense non fiction book on evolution and I need a fun, light read... Nothing stewpid though like Danielle Steele or whatev, just entertaining fiction with mentally stimulating context. PLEASE help me?


Aslo, boys, boys, boys... where for art thou?


I WANT YOU MORE THAN ANYONE EVER MAYBE:

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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

+/-

Currently listening to (often):

-The Books
-Nellie McKay
-Busta Rhymes
-Boards Of Canada
-Broadcast
-The Doors
-Animal Collective
-Ariel Pink's Haunted Graffiti
-Against Me!
-Lady Gaga
-The Postal Service
-Sufjan Stevens


Currently eating/drinking (often):

-fish sammiches
-Cheez-Its
-blueberries
-cheap red wine
-Ocean Spray cran-apple juice


Currently hating (in general):

-fuckin' OCTOMOM
-meatloaf or meatballs... anything made of ground beef really
-my bangs
-my phone
-my back (I feel like I'm 90)
-driving


Currently loving (in general):

-Lady Gaga
-Katy Perry
-drinking liquids (I've been VERY thirsty)
-my kittehh
-my new fisheye lens
-snow
-new friends

The only bus I want to ride.

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I eat T.V. dinners whilst intoxicated as well, Ashley. But my boobs look nowhere near as spectac. as yours do.

Monday, March 2, 2009

omg. yes.

Paris+LMFAO=YESSSSSSSSSSS


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BULLSHIT

soooooo I forgot all of my login info for my old blog. Something happened, it wasn't me, I'm not that retarded. Follow this one.